(formerly)tangentmind.org

Yeah, so this is pretty funny. I mean...what was that I was just diagnosed with? Oh yeah, that's right, depression.
Edit: I'm not sure I mentioned that I took methylphenidate(Ritalin) when I was 8 and then took it for a few years after that.

I will admit, I have depression and anxiety and they come and go. So, I'm given one brain drug to cope with the effects of a previous brain drug. For the most part I've learned how to cope with depression and anxiety. I mean, I have my moments, like when my brain seizes up in social situations or my body suddenly reacts like I'm being shot at when I see someone I don't want to see...but for the most part simply learning how not to feel is enough to keep out all the negative vibes. Secondly, learning to laugh at everything makes happiness possible.

What I can not cope with however, is the constant nagging feeling that I should be throwing up. I'd rather not. Not to mention the, much worse than normal, restlessness that makes it impossible to sit still. I think I have been shaking my leg for about an hour straight...maybe 30 mintues. Not sure. I can't tell how much time has passed nad I can't remember what I was doing 5 minutes ago. The watery eyes, runny nose, and constant feeling of yawning(see yesterday's post), does not make anything better. I think my chest slightly burns. Hopefully it's just indigestion or hallucination and not something more serious.

I'm not taking the lexapro tomorrow. Let's see if I crash when I come down.